Early on when I was new, I knew there were certain things that I needed to do.
My first sponsor Kenneth W. had made an appointment to meet with me at a six oclock pm meeting at the group we called home; it was time to take the next Step. A Character defect that sill plagues me to this day is thinking that I have more time to get from point A to Point B as I still try to jam moments into minutes as the hours quickly slip away. I checked the time as traffic mercilessly piled to a stop and crawl frenzy. I was too new to walk through the doors with this lackadaisical arrogance of disrespect. It would be too disruptive as all eyes would be on me and the discomfort from the groups laser disdain would be some more of a deserved claim to shame. It was the time before ringtones when the phone rang off the wall; it was my sponsor “Did you not understand we had an appointment, I showed up, where were you?†I am sorry as I went into my monologue. He let me speak unabated, until he said Your justification, rationalization and minimization were a thing to behold and the next time I need any of these I know whom to call, Kenneth continued Joseph it’s not all about you, the only recovery meeting your ever late for is your very first meeting, as it took you too long to get here. If you make to the closing prayer our right on time, and by the way if you miss another appointment without a call you are disrespecting my time that could be used for someone who is serious about the gift of recovery
That lesson has served me well over the years, I go to a meeting and have made it for the closing prayer, or have participated in the meeting after the meeting. I am reluctant to volunteer to share my E.S.H. when coming in late, unless called upon, but having so many words and so few thoughts, it’s more of a guideline than a rule.
Immunity from alcohol, despair, and the free lunch
Kenneth struggled for a buck, he is Mensa (of the highest caliber of intellect) had found himself living in a pump house on lake Travis. Kenneth was adept in most things he put his back or his mind too. I had a business in Austin and lived and worked out of a warehouse. Kenneth agreed to change out the brakes on my Toyota Four runner while working on the brakes he said that he did not have enough money to buy himself a meal for the coming day. What are you going to do? I asked Kenneth replied, I do what I always do when things get tough, what is that? I asked, His reply I work with another alcoholic, and when I do my needs are met, and my needs are met when I work with another alcoholic That concept has become a working part of his mind as it was reinforced over and over again until it manifested itself into a spiritual reality. Kenneth remains as far as I know a card carrying agnostic.
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Joseph
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