Alcohol and Drug informational resource

The Swollen Foot King

Rex shared first on the topic found on page 23 of the Big Book, the reasoning or lack of reasoning of the alcoholic to take the first drink. Rex has been in the spin dry for quite some time and picked up yet another 60 day chip. Rex is most familiar with the subject of relapse. Rex is an older fellow of a lager stature with snowy white hair and is always attired in the farmers blue bib over wear.

When we were first introduced I  was with a long time sober friend Charley, Charley  had observed “that he was not one of us  but a lonely old man that needed to be heard, that he felt safe in the rooms of acceptance, and compassion. I can not say as he collects beginners chips in sufficient amounts to reroof the house of a large family pet, but never so much as to take the action to obtain a sponsor and diligently attack the Steps. Rex is often called on to speak for his shares are simple if not unique to the ravages of the problem of abstinence, as somehow or someway that his age and white hair has made him sage.

The meeting began in a round robin format as you get to choose the next participant of sober speak with a hit and then a miss rotation. Rex finished up his share with an introduction of great acclaim , a person he highly respects and esteems, always speaks with confidence and stays right on topic and balances the service and sobriety  beam. I had my head down in a place of obvious humility knowing he was going to call on me. My friend “Chip” Rex was heard to say; my head remained in abbreviated kowtow position in order to accentuate my obvious humility. Chip is a young Big Book thumper and views me with a jaundiced eye as a grandstander seeking a higher platform of esteem and recognition.

Some people don’t know me and they don’t like me some people get to know me, then they don’t like me, it’s none of my business what you think of me, for you think so little of me anyway, if not in stature ,surely in time

The meeting was suddenly changed to a volunteer format, share your ESH (Experience, Strength and Hope) if so moved, you can have the floor if not the room. I would take a bite of this fortuitous apple.

Hi my name is Joseph G and I am  a grateful recovered Alcoholic, I must confess as I was a bit surprised when I heard all the accolades coming from Rex  and just knew he must have been  talking about me!. I might not be much, but I am all I think about.

Oedipus means a swollen foot, that’s what you get sometimes when working with a new sponsee.

I have come to the understanding that all meetings in recovery are gratitude meetings, with deference to the topic spin, the topic whenever possible should be addressed, but sometimes there may be something else that needs to be said. I was privileged to hear in a meeting not all that too long ago, that when I shared in a meeting that I was participating in my own recovery, perhaps the most important thing I might hear can fall gingerly from my own lips, reinforcing the solution without guile or hypocrisy to my own judgment free subconscious.

I would proceed if I may, with a non fallacious interpretation of why people don’t say

The number one fear is speaking in public It seems this phenomenon is a stretch at best when viewed at first blush. I have come to the understanding that ridicule is death to the ego (Shakespeare observed that it is better to be thought the fool, than to speak and remove all doubt) Jesus said (it’s not what goes into a man’s mouth that defileth him. It’s what comes out) the ego in a vain attempt to stay alive would sacrifice the body on the alter of pride. The preacher said vanity, vanity, all is vanity.

As you can see, as well as hear sometimes my sobriety is all about me being clear about what I am saying as well as doing about my own recovery.

See you on the radio



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